


The force in my life that I just might have to live without...

by Rk900 (Thief_0f_heart)



Category: Detroit Evolution - Fandom, Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with no happy ending, Character Death, Coma, Death, Detroit Evolution, Deviant Upgraded Connor | RK900, Feels, Gavin Reed Needs a Hug, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Murder, Nines whump, Panic Attacks, Suicide, Upgraded Connor | RK900 Whump, Whump, major whumpage, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:53:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27033745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thief_0f_heart/pseuds/Rk900
Summary: Someone from the Octopunk Media Discord server gave me this AU and I HAD to write it!
Relationships: Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed
Comments: 10
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

It all happened so fast. He had been walking Ada home from the bar when they turned on an alleyway. Nines had stopped, telling Ada that this wasn’t the route back to New Jericho. Next thing he knew Ada had her hand around his throat and forcefully probed his software, stealing it. He fought back against it which ended in him being pushed against the wall, Ada’s hand over his thirium pump- _his heart_. “Ada.. please. You don’t have to do this..” Ada had froze before shaking her head, “Oh, but I do.” And then she ripped out his heart.

**_[̧͇̥̰͚I̷͈̲͟͠M̷̧̞̘̹͓̫̥̜M̮̗̙̜͈̙̕I̺͓͈N̷̡̺͈̯̥̞E҉͓̞̞̥͍̺̫̝N̵͉͎̠͇͍̱͕̘̗T̰̼̝̝̘̩̝ ͕̺̩ͅS͔͉̣H̲͔̱͞͡U҉̲̮̺T̸̨̛̝̝̳D̸̴͕̩̗͜Ǫ̥̘͇̼̞̱̬͇͜W̛̝̪N̴̺̼͍͇͎̮͠ ̬̮̖͓͉͚͔͚I̙̜̕N͇̘̯͎͇̹:̤̖̠͜ ͚̟͖̰̻͎̳̕͢0̴͚̗0̞̯̤̩͍͎̗̙͘͜:̵̷͓͙̩͍̣̩͔0̝̹1̡̢̖͎͉ͅ:̵̣̲͇̺̪̜̪̞͡4͠͏̺͍͈̮͖͙3̸̥̰̝.̵̞͈̳̲̹̻̥8̹̯͓͖̻̗͠0̻̥̞͍̠͚͡]̸̞̥̣̞̥̞̟͓̠͡_ **

Nines opened his eyes and realized he was slumped against the wall, _alone_. He tried to call the DPD, tried to call Gavin, tried to call _anyone_ , but his data corruption was too much. He was just stuck there. He looked around, his thirium pump across the alley. If he could just get to it.

**_[̢̥̳̣̦̕͢͡I̵͔̼̟̖̝̖̙̳͈̭̮̙̞͚̝̜͟ͅM̕҉̠̠̯̮͇̪̭̮͓̳̫̭̜̘̯̣͝ͅM̡̧̪̫̪͖̥͉͍̞Į̷̡͏̳͔̖̹͈̝̘̱̯̰̞̱̹̱̝͕N̶̵̢͙͎̹͕̲̻̗̜͟Ę̴̢̺͇̞͈̥̲̱͉͇̟͍̳͉̟͚̳̬͈͟͢Ṋ̴̼̺̰̳͔̻̻̲͇̤Ṯ̡̨͍͙̝͉ͅ ̶̨̞̳̯͔̯̲̜̖S̛̹̞̤̼̯̣̝̕͘H͈̜̘̥̞̼̰̮̕͝U̢̧̬̺̪̝̺͚͇̜̝̼̯̗̗̩T̷̴͓̝ͅD̦͔̣̖͚̹͟͞͞O̶̵̧̰̣̥̗͓̹͙͚̘̭̣͇̰̭̩̺̠̕͢W͢͏̛͈̖̦̮͈͕̯̗͔͈̗̙ͅN̳̯͈͕͖̘͎͍̹͉̠͈̟͘͜͞͝ͅͅ ̵̬̠̮̖̥̦͡I͍̼̗̜̖̥͘͝N̘̥̫̳̥̤͡:̱͙͚̝͚͜ ͡͏̗͇̺̩̦͇̠̼̯̥̭͎͙̰0̸̡̹͖̤͉͘͟0̢̼̝̪̻̩̘̯̰̲͘:̨̛͕̤̳̹̩͎̣͕̳̮̗͚͘0̶̷̭͍̦̲̞͚̗̰͇͢͡0̴̝̪̦̩̤̺̣̥̭̰:̴̧̛̥̙̥̦̝̮͙͢0̴̨̭̩͔̜͔̙̮͘ͅ9͏̠͚͈̯̖̠͚̱̠̮̖ͅͅ.̶̛͍͔̜̩̘̩̝̕͠9̷͔̣͉͖̦̘͕̰͎̤͇̖͇̳͜9͓̻͉̲̻͕̰̹̠͉͘]̸̡̤̫͚̪̠̗̩̝̼͎͚͔͕̙̜͖͘͟_ **

He couldn’t. He felt himself slip away. The last thing he heard was Gavin’s undeniable voice, “Fuck! Ni-”

~~

The cyberlife building had an awful feel to it. Like a hospital. You could hear the beeping of monitors, the smell of cleaning supplies, and once the sound of sobbing from someone who, presumably, had just lost a loved one. It made Gavin sick. He and Tina waited until a doctor came to them. “Please, Have a seat,” She told them her name, Maria, Gavin recalls. She tells them that she was the lead designer for the RK line. She tells them about Nines’ operating system being in tatters. She tells them about the thirium loss. But worst of all, she tells them that Nines is in a coma. That he may never awake from. Gavin remembers thanking the doctor before she walks out, right before he slams his head back against the wall.

“She was fascinated by Nines. I thought it was ‘cause she wanted to be with him or something. But, she just… wanted a piece of him.. To use. And she did it to dozens of others. Killing ‘em for parts. How does an android do that to other androids?” He finally says. Tina looks at him sadly, “If humans can be serial killers, Why not androids?” Gavin sighs, “At least humans are easy to track down. She knew… everything to say. She calculated every step and we fell for it.” Tina looks down, “Nines didn’t realize, either. She wasn’t a suspect. You couldn’t have known. But now you do, and you can stop her!” Gavin shakes his head, “Not without Nines.” 

Gavin takes a shuddery breath before speaking again, “The last thing I said to him was, I.. I don’t _need you_..” Tina tries to comfort him, “You’ve said way worse to him before and it’s never kept you guys apart.” Gavin looks at her, “It’s different this time, T. He might never wake up.” He pauses before whispering, “And the last thing I told him was that I didn’t _need_ him…” He looks up at Tina again, Eyes glistening with tears, “What if they have to reset him just for the _possibility_ of him waking up?” Tina puts a hand on his shoulder, a few tears in her eyes as well now, “Hey. You’ll figure it out.. You always do.”

~~ 

"Hey, Nines." he starts quietly, looking up at Tina who just nods with a thumbs up, fuck he was already getting emotional over this. “We don’t know where Ada is. Or what she’s gonna do next. So we just… Just really need you back. You know? To stop her.” A knock on the window and Tina’s reassuring nod is all it takes for Gavin to spill everything. “Okay… Okay, tin can. I need you. I need you to come back.” Gavin hesitates for a moment before taking Nines’ hand, feeling the white chassis that was under his skin. “I was… The absolute goddamn worst to you when we met. Chris and Tina took bets on how long it’d take for us to kill each other. But.. You.. You stuck through it. You gave me as much shit as I gave you. And eventually I stopped doing it just to piss you off and did it, I did it ‘cause.. It’s just what we do. You are my partner. You are my best friend. And you are this.. Force in my life that I can’t live without.”

Gavin paused for a moment before speaking again, “I don’t wanna go back. I can’t go back.. To being without you. No matter what happens, You’ve never given up on me. Come back to me, Nines. _I love you_...” 

~~

Back at the DPD Tina and Chris had found Ada’s hiding spot and planned to arrest her asap. They got into the car and drove over. Tina called backup to wait outside while she and Chris went inside. Ada had tried to run and was caught outside by the backup. She was arrested and taken back to the DPD for questioning.

~~  
Gavin had been sitting next to Nines for hours even after Tina left. He must’ve drifted off at some point because he was shaken awake by Tina. 

“We caught her.” She had said. Gavin smiled barley, “Good.” Tina then spoke sadly, “I don’t think Nines’ is going to wake up. And even if he will, We don’t know when that will be.” Gavin looked up at Tina almost angrily, “What do you want me to do about that?” “Go home. You can’t just stay here until he wakes up,” Tina sighed, placing a hand on Gavin’s shoulder. “Go home.”

And so he does.

~~

Gavin walks into his apartment and collapses on the couch before looking over and seeing one of Nines’ white Jackets. That _breaks_ him. He starts sobbing and shaking. He grabs the jacket and bawls into it. The only thought running through his head is, Nines, His partner, His best friend, and the force in his life that he can't live without, may never wake up.

He might never be able to see that beautiful face smirking down at him. Or those icy blue eyes sparkle. He might not ever get to hear that gorgeous laugh. He might not ever get to feel those strong arms wrap around him in a hug. He might not ever get to kiss Nines..


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains themes of suicide! Please beware! Stay safe!

_**Two months** _

It had been two months since Nines had gone into that coma. Two months since Gavin had ruined everything. Cause, In all truthfulness, this was _his_ fault. The only reason Nines had gone with Ada was because Gavin had shut him out. If Gavin had just _talked_ to Nines, maybe he’d still be here. Maybe he wouldn’t have gone with Ada. Maybe, just maybe, they’d be together.

Gavin and Tina had been called into cyberlife and Gavin had hope. Maybe Nines was getting better. Maybe he was getting closer to waking up. All of the hope disappeared when he saw Dr. Maria’s face. He’d seen that face too many times. Hell, He’d been the one to make that face on several occasions. That was the face of bad news. Usually, With his experience, that face is made when the person is going to talk about the death of your loved one. 

Gavin’s thoughts were confirmed when the doctor sat Tina and him down. “I’m sorry,” Was all she had to say before Gavin felt like the air was being knocked out of him. He tried his hardest to listen to what she had to say, he really did. But the impending panic attack made its way forward.

“He’s dead. He’s dead, isn’t he? Ada killed him. He’s gone and I-” He was cut off by Tina. “Gavin, Let her finish.” Gavin shut up. But his body didn’t stop shaking. He tried to regulate his breathing but then Dr. Maria said, “I’m afraid Ada's probe was just too much for his systems to handle along with his thirium pump being ripped out. There is little to no chance that he ever wakes up.” Gavin’s breathing hitched and sputtered. “I called you both in here today to give you an option. Either, pull the plug. Or just wait until it’s not enough.” Gavin began hyperventilating. “S-Shit. N-no. NO! He can’t be g-gone. Fuck! Tina, I never. I never told him. He pr-probably left thinking I ha-hate him. Or... or something! F-fuck.. I. I can’t. Shit. T. I can’t. Can’t breathe.” Tina just pulled Gavin into a hug, hushing him and rubbing circles into his back. “Hey hey hey, breathe in. 1 2 3. Breathe out. 4 5 6. Repeat.” They did that until he was calmer.

Dr. Maria looked down, “What would you like to do.” Gavin spoke grimly, “Pull.. Pull the plug…” Tina looked surprised, “Gav, are you sure?” Gavin just nodded, the lump in his throat growing bigger. “It’s the best option. He probably won’t… wake up.. It hurts. But. I’ll have to learn to live without… him.” The last word was almost a whisper before he began sobbing. Dr. Maria just put a hand on his shoulder, “You’ll have a funeral, I suppose?” Tina nodded, answering for Gavin, “Yes. Of course.” The doctor walked out and the two were left holding each other, crying.

~~

The funeral had been beautiful. In a horrible sort of way. Everyone from the DPD was there. Connor was a mess, sobbing and emotional. He had lost his brother. It hurt Gavin just to see him. He doubts he’ll ever be able to look at him without it hurting. Hank was grim. With Connors help, He had managed to stay sober even after struggling due to the loss of _another_ son. Tina was crying. Chris was shaking. Even Markus was there, looking pained and sad. Gavin found it beautiful. Nines had managed to touch everyone’s heart in one way or another. But the best part was when everyone said a few words. It was heart wrenching. It stung, in a beautiful way. The funeral was just beautiful, not unlike Nines himself. 

~~ 

After the funeral Gavin went home. He didn’t get much sleep. He cried. He smoked. He cried some more. When he finally drifted off, he had one of his worst nightmares yet. He awoke with a jolt and it finally hit him. He was without Nines. He’d never see him again. And that. That scared him more than anything else. He couldn’t live without Nines. It just wasn’t possible. Nines was the only thing keeping him here. And now. He was gone.

And so, Before he knew what he was doing, Gavin had pulled out a gun, put it to his head, and pulled the trigger.

~~

Gavin woke up in a garden he’d never seen before. He felt a hand on his shoulder. He spun around and there he was. Nines. Nines was there. He was looking down at Gavin with the saddest look. “I’m sorry-” He started but Gavin cut him off, “Fuck, I missed you.” He pulled the taller one down into a kiss, tears running down his face.

**Author's Note:**

> My bad-


End file.
